Showing posts with label low self esteem. Show all posts
Showing posts with label low self esteem. Show all posts

Monday, 20 June 2016

Allowing students to develop their mind through independent thinking

In Nigeria, and Africa in general, culture has always played a significant role in education. It is the belief that every child should go to school and receive quality education which will make them self sufficient when they become adults, and less dependent on anyone to survive.

Invariably, culture also dictated how an individual's life should be planned. It is the acceptable norm that after graduating from high school, the next course of action is to attend University and study for a degree course. Upon the completion of the degree course, the individual is expected to work for money. There is nothing inherently wrong with this line of reasoning.

However, with the gradual passage of time, the dynamic nature of events has paved way for a new paradigm shift. In the new dispensation of globalisation,  entrepreneurship is now the growing trend.

Children can now be taught at a young impressionable age to allow "money to work for them", instead of them  "working for money". And it is by allowing children to think in creative ways for themselves about what they are passionate about to kickstart their entrepreneurial dream is now very important.

Furthermore, after engaging in one form of profession or another, society also determines that the next order of priority is to get married. After marriage, and without delaying too much time unnecessary, the newly wedded couple are expected to start having children.

The afore-mentioned is a prime example of how African culture has shaped individual thoughts right from when a child start attending primary school till the time they get married.

It is doubtful whether the opinions of children were sought at any age by their parents regarding their own choices of what they want to do with their lives. African culture has also been about norms and practices. Elders spoke and the younger ones were expected to obey without raising any form of dissent. Respect and obeisance for elders is absolutely important.

Also, fear and the threat of punishment was used as a tool to mould the behavour of the younger generation. It shaped the nucleus of law and order in the society and any form of rebellion was dealt with. For instance, in Nigerian schools, the norm as it has always been, was the students recognised teachers and lecturers as their father and mother figures.

The same culture also conditioned the minds of students to accept what they were taught  by their teachers in school without disagreeing openly with the teacher.

In other words, students were being taught what to think and not how to think independently. Any student that questions or disagrees with a lecturer is seen as a rebel and is summarily punished for being audacious.

To make matters worse, even some parents don't give their children the freedom to choose the course they wish to study in the University. Many examples abound of students who were forced to study Medicine or Law, simply because their parents excelled in that particular profession. In the end, some of these children had to abandon the course half way into their degree.

Two reasons accounted for this. Firstly, such students were unable to cope with the demands of the rigorous course having being 'forced' into it by their parents. Secondly, since the students were not passionate about studying the course from the onset, they would not be inclined to pour all their energy and mind into it. The end result would be frustration, depression and a heightened sense of low self esteem.

Be that as it may, the student will also continue to under perform in their studies, thereby denying them the opportunity to really excel in their preferred course of study. Aligned to this, is also the wasted time they would have spent studying a course they utterly disliked.

Evidently, this is a clear case of students that were deprived of the ability to think independently for themselves. This robs students of their creative mind to use lateral and logical reasoning skills. When adults continue to determine what they think is best for children, it can create a divisive wall between parent and child and ultinately lead to resentment.

It is a recognisable fact that the duty of a patent or guardian is to guide the career aspirations of their wards. However, this guidance or advice should not be enforced without soliciting the opinion of their children.

By not doing this, many students will not be able to properly develop logical and deductive reasoning skills that will help them immensely with their personal development.

Added to this, the children will grow accustomed to delegating key important aspects of their lives to their parents, as opposed to thinking objectively and independently on their own.

The school system and parents can help change the cultural mindset of thinking for students all the time. Let children grow up to be confident, assertive and independently minded. But this can only be made possible if they are allowed to exercise their creative mind.

As Frank Zappa noted, he said "A mind is like a parachute. It does not work until it is open".  Children should not only be seen, they should he heard. Let their creative minds speak. As adults, if we take time to listen to the young minds of children, we will learn a lot.

Wednesday, 22 August 2012

10 tips of how to overcome your low self esteem



1. Believe in yourself

Start seeing yourself as a high flier. It is only you that can turn things around. Take a chance and step out. Lao Tsu once said that “the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”.






2. Stop feeling sorry for yourself

If life knocks you down, you have the right to blame the circumstances of life. However, if you are still down, then it is down to you. You need to dust yourself and get up. See yourself as a go getter, and only you can stop you from realizing your dreams.









3. Stop making excuses
 
Don’t blame the economy, the recession, and lack of money, your boss, your family or friends for your present predicament. They written their own chapter in your life and gone like the wind. But you now have the opportunity to rewrite your life, the way you would like it to be. Remember, an author is not restricted with words.





4. Restructure your life

Let go of friends or people in your life that do not value you. Trust me, I know it’s hard, but it has to be done. If you want to operate on a different level, you need to move out of their circle. Give yourself the freedom to discover a new you.









5. Don’t look back

Let go of past hurts. Forgive and move on. If someone does not want in their lives, let them go. Don’t hold on. It’s their loss. You are priceless in someone else’s eyes. There is a person somewhere, waiting for you to be a blessing in their life. And most importantly, your worth is inestimable to the world that is crying out for what you can offer.



6. Hang out with the right people

Eagles don’t hang out with chicken. The eagle is a high flyer. Whereas, the chicken looks down and pecks on the floor. As a result the chicken has no vision, no horizon, no diversification, no perspective and no territories to explore. Hang with the right people by join a self improvement networking group.







7. Thinking positively

As words are powerful, so too are the thoughts we allow to filter through our minds. You need to start growing positive thoughts and get rid of negative ones. Be careful of what you listen to and especially what you read. You need to be aware that your thoughts manifest itself into words before it you act them out.




8. Take care of your appearance
  
How you dress is how you will be addressed. Take extreme good care of yourself by always dressing smart everywhere you go, as you don't know whom you might meet or network with.
                                                                  
                                                                  





9. Be full of life

 
You need to rediscover a zest for life. Always remember, that no matter your circumstances, someone was once in your position wondering how they will come of their predicament. Say to yourself that it is not over until it is over. There is not point giving up on life when you’ve still got your whole life ahead of you. Good times still await you.




10. Smile and be grateful

You need to wake up everyday, even if it’s on the wrong side of the bed, and be grateful for life. There are probably people in worse situations than you. Look around you, there is probably something or someone that you are thankful for. Don’t despise small blessings. And remember to smile always. When you radiate happiness, it’s because of the things you are thankful for and not necessarily the changes you are expecting to happen in your life.